I Am That I Am
Francis Bennett
Mike Ervin

Bennett -I Am That I Am – Chapter-by-Chapter Summary

God Is in Everything and Everything Is in God (Introduction): Bennett begins by proclaiming the fundamental truth that each person’s real identity is pure present-moment awareness, whose very nature is happiness, peace and “pure bliss” .  He urges readers to test this directly, rather than merely take his word for it.  To set the stage he recounts his own journey – from being a worldly young man drawn into Trappist monastic life (inspired by Thomas Merton) to years of meditation practice.  He notes that after awakening his personal “story of Francis” feels almost like a novel – useful only as a pointer.  In fact, “when awakening happens, what we awaken from is an absolute belief in the story. … We no longer take it to be reality” .  Key theme: the book’s premise is that the long-sought key to happiness has always been within us as the unborn awareness that underlies all experience.

• True Self vs. ego-story – Bennett emphasizes that stories (personal or religious) merely point to deeper reality; our task is to see beyond them
• Core teaching: “Who you really are…is simple present-moment awareness, and the essential true nature of this awareness is itself happiness, peace and pure bliss.” . All seeking of joy is essentially a seeking of this awareness itself.
• (Autobiographical note) Bennett’s background: an idealistic seminarian inspired by St. Francis and Thomas Merton, who entered a Trappist monastery at 23; he describes how, in retrospect, that history seems like a “thumbnail sketch” of a life – a useful pointer but not the essence of who he is .

Chapter 1: Shift – Paying Attention to What Is Already Here

Bennett opens with a movie-theater analogy: we usually focus on the “movie” of life (experiences, thoughts, emotions) and completely overlook the “screen” – the always-present awareness that makes everything possible. He explains that awareness is the unchanging backdrop for any experience .  This awareness is not something separate to gain – it is who we are at the core. Even if we feel unaware at times, the very fact that we can notice our lack of awareness shows that awareness is “always there” . Bennett calls this true Self “God’s beloved child” – an unchangeable essence in all of us .

• Awareness is ever-present and unaffected by events: “no matter what appears on it,” the screen “always remains the same” . Likewise, our clear knowing is an “ever present, ever peaceful awareness” that underlies all experiences .
• This unchanging awareness is the foundation on which all changeable thoughts, emotions and sensations arise . Bennett urges us to shift our attention from the contents of experience to the awareness that knows them .
• Personal anecdote: To illustrate this shift, Bennett recounts a wild audience at a Rocky Horror Picture Show screening. When someone doused the movie screen with red liquid, everyone’s attention snapped off the movie and onto the blank screen . In Bennett’s words, the prankster “unknowingly” acted as a spiritual teacher by forcefully shifting our attention from objects to awareness .
• The exercise of noticing the space or “screen” all around things (instead of only the things themselves) is a form of spiritual practice. Any genuine practice leads to the same goal: realizing the awareness that is already here .
• Key insight: When we rest as that aware Presence, we discover we can be happy under any circumstances. We “focus on the unchanging presence,” and find the presence of God within . In this chapter Bennett makes clear that true awakening is simply noticing the awareness that has always been there .

Chapter 2: The Search for Happiness

Bennett explores the futile search for happiness in external things. He observes that most people spend a lifetime chasing pleasure, success or comfort, not realizing that the very “joy and happiness” they seek is their own innate nature . Our culture may treat the pursuit of happiness as life’s purpose, but Bennett says all we truly want is already present as the core of our being. He notes that once we discover our Self as this awareness, we immediately find ourselves “blissfully happy” regardless of circumstances .

• Non-dual teaching: Happiness is not dependent on any condition; it is the essence of who you already are. As Bennett states, “This joy and happiness is actually your undeniable heritage as God’s beloved child. You are, in fact, yourself infinite love, joy and happiness” .
• He points out that people only seek externally because they have not realized this. Even the highest fulfillment (whether spiritual or material) fails to satisfy if we don’t know our true nature.
• Bennett urges a turn inward: instead of looking outside for joy, recognize that all you seek is already fully within you . (In later chapters he will explore practices to realize this, but here he lays the groundwork: the search for happiness is essentially a call to wake up to one’s own being.)

Chapter 3: Discovering Who We Always Were

Building on the insight that our true identity is ever-present, Bennett invites readers to “wake up” to who they always were. He cautions that our personal narratives and identities are just temporary costumes – useful only as pointers. Upon awakening, what dissolves is not the world but our belief in the story of “me” as separate.

• Ego and story: Bennett writes that after awakening, even his résumé “felt like reading a description of somebody else’s life” . He emphasizes, “none of us are our stories in any absolute sense” . Every story has a deeper lesson, but the truth it points to is more important than the details of the story itself .
• He introduces the idea of the true Self beyond ego (sometimes called Atman or Christ within). This Self is ever there, even as roles, names and life events change.
• (Autobiographical) Bennett shares some history from these years: for instance, as a young monk he had glimpses of presence (satori) during Zen retreats. He even wrote a short poem about one such moment: “I am That / Simply, the Sun is beaming in… / all there is … is, THAT.”. This poem captures how those bursts of awareness revealed a Self beyond the personal “I.”
• Key point: Recognizing “who we always were” means dropping the narrative self and abiding as the ever-present awareness. In awakening, one realizes that the “inner God” (imago Dei) or Atman was here all along beneath the changing story.

Chapter 4: Now I Am

This chapter emphasizes the present-moment “I am”, the immediate sense of being awake. Bennett explains that once awareness is recognized, our identity shifts from “I was” or “I will be” into the timeless “Now I am.” The present is no longer a means to something but the end itself: eternal life in awareness.

• Bennett points out that true peace and happiness appear the instant we identify with the ever-present now. He says, right now – without effort – “a peaceful joy and happiness is already present at the very core of your being .” This joy is unconditional and unshakeable.
• He connects this insight to the teaching “I am that I am”: now we know experientially that “who [we] really am…is simple present-moment awareness” , and realizing this is equivalent to discovering one’s divine nature.
• (Autobiographical) Bennett describes the pivotal awakening experience he had in 2010 during Mass. As the consecrated wafer was placed in his hand, he suddenly “had no language… no thoughts. The mind just stopped… I was just like… ‘What is everything?’” . In that moment his sense of separate self and even his concept of God seemed to vanish, replaced by simple awareness and bliss. This concrete episode illustrates Now I am: a spontaneous drop into pure presence.
• He concludes that from this awakened perspective, one lives with an inner stability: “we can be happy, no matter what” because our awareness remains ever-present .  The “now” state is not something to achieve later – it is always here, waiting to be noticed.

Chapter 5: Living the Awakened Life

Here Bennett explores the practical fruits of awakening in everyday life. With the discovery that awareness is unconditionally peaceful, one naturally lives with inner freedom and compassion. This chapter stresses that awakening doesn’t mean ignoring life; rather, it transforms how we engage with it.

• Key insight: Unconditional joy and peace are now our natural state. Bennett says this abiding happiness is the “essential true nature” of awareness . It is always with us, so life’s ups and downs no longer perturb the foundation of our being.
• Even in difficulty, we can rest in spacious awareness. He poetically quotes mystics: “God’s in His heaven… and all’s right with the world,” and “all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well” . In context Bennett explains that awareness can contain any experience without losing equilibrium. For example, when harsh emotions arise, we can still be grounded in the peaceful presence that gives them place .
• He emphasizes that this is not abstract: it is the Imago Dei within. In Hindu terms it is the Atman – our indwelling divinity . Knowing that “the presence of awareness can accommodate absolutely anything,” we are truly free and compassionate toward all beings.
• Bennett also highlights that living awakened means expressing love and service. He continued his work as a hospice chaplain and retreat leader, but now out of the deep stillness rather than personal ambition. In all activities, he says, “the open spacious presence of awareness” shines through, bringing healing even in small interactions.

Chapter 6: Spiritual Practices

Bennett reviews various practices that facilitate awakening, noting that they all point inward. These include Christian contemplative practices (like Centering Prayer), Buddhist mindfulness/Vipassana, and traditional Advaita inquiry. The point of any practice, he says, is to redirect attention to the ever-present awareness.

• He shares that he was inspired by Ramana Maharshi’s self-inquiry. As he read The Spiritual Teaching of Ramana Maharshi, Ramana’s simple question “Who am I?” deeply resonated. Bennett calls this practice “self-investigation” or “self-abiding” because the goal is to rest in the sense of “I am” .
• Mindfulness in daily life is another key practice. Bennett practiced Vipassana meditation and also used the Trappist discipline of being fully present during work and prayer. These practices train one to notice the space of awareness behind thoughts and sensations.
• In Christian terms, Centering Prayer (wordless prayer) is very similar: by silently repeating a sacred word or just resting in God’s presence, one learns to “let go” of thoughts and abide in God. Bennett taught that silence and awareness are the same inner practice.
• The unifying theme is that practice is simply remembering that awareness is already here. Whether through meditation, breath awareness, chanting, or prayer, each method is a tool to meet the always-present Self. Ultimately, awareness is not something to be attained; it is recognized.

Chapter 7: But How Do I Just Become ‘More Aware’?

In this chapter Bennett addresses the common question of how to “become” aware. He points out that asking this question already assumes you are separate from awareness. One is already awareness; the trouble is identifying with mind-stories.

• The shift is to stop adding anything. We uncover awareness by noticing the blocks to it. Bennett often says, “Stop doing and just be aware of what is.” Rather than striving to be more awake, we simply stop believing in unawareness.
• Practically, one dismantles unhelpful thoughts, beliefs and identities. By gently investigating any sense of “I am lacking awareness,” we see that the belief itself vanishes when examined.
• He reassures that you don’t need mystical experiences to be aware – as he experienced in chapter 4, awareness can be recognized even in ordinary moments (he cites how seeing the breath, hands, or sense of being alive can anchor you in presence).
• (Autobiographical) Bennett mentions that after his awakening he needed no formal practice to remain aware; rather, he simply “marinated” in silence every day. He suggests others adopt even a few minutes of sitting quietly, observing thoughts like clouds passing, to become more familiar with their true nature.

Chapter 8: Think About What You Think About

Bennett turns attention to the mind itself. He notes that much suffering comes from unconscious, repetitive thoughts and conditioned patterns.

• He advises developing mindfulness of thinking. Notice the contents of mind and how we react to them. By being aware of thoughts as they arise, we create space around them.
• Through inquiry, we can ask “What is the thinker?” and find that it dissolves into awareness. Thoughts are seen as mere events in consciousness, not facts about reality.
• An important exercise he mentions is to check negative thinking. By realizing “I am thinking this thought” rather than identifying with it, we disarm it.
• He also emphasizes gratitude: thinking about how precious awareness is (“You think about what you think about, or just be grateful.” – a phrase he uses) helps re-orient the mind toward love.
• In short, Bennett uses this chapter to remind readers that even our thinking can be placed in the light of awareness, preventing runaway stories and keeping us present.

Chapter 9: The Way of the Cross

Drawing on Christian imagery, Bennett reflects on suffering and compassion. He shares a moving story: while helping care for a dying patient (a dear friend named Mary), he perceived Mary’s agony as the same profound sorrow that Jesus expressed on the cross.

• He describes seeing a realistic crucifix (Christ bloody and in pain) and suddenly sensing that Mary’s tears were the same “koan” (“My God, why have you forsaken me?”) that Jesus spoke on the cross . In that moment, compassion melted all separation – Mary herself became for him an icon of the suffering Christ .
• This realization underscored a non-dual truth: in love and suffering, we are all one. By seeing Christ’s face in Mary, Bennett felt that the division between Jesus/God and ordinary human agony dissolved. The “sacred presence” he had long sought was alive in that compassionate recognition .
• Teachings: Through this metaphor, he teaches that true empathy (the heart’s awareness) is the same presence he speaks of elsewhere. The cross, in Bennett’s view, symbolizes the intersection of divine and human: awareness immanent in every experience.
• He encourages readers to view their own sufferings as pathways to empathy, and reminds Christian readers that Jesus’s own nondual teaching is found in his example of unconditional love on the cross.

Chapter 10: The Purest Teaching Is Silence

Bennett concludes by extolling silence as the highest teacher. After all concepts have dropped away, pure being remains. He recounts writing this chapter immediately after experiencing a profound state of silence on retreat

• He notes that nothing has to be added – one only needs to stop and abide in the silence of now. In fact, he says, after his awakening he spent many hours each day simply “marinating” in silent awareness .
• In silence, words and thoughts disappear. Bennett describes his moment of awakening: looking at the consecrated host, he suddenly had no words, no language – just a boundless wonder . This illustrated that ultimate knowing is wordless.
• Quotable line: “The Purest Teaching is Silence.” In these closing pages he invites us to experience truth directly by listening inwardly. As he says, after basking in that deep silence, he wrote the chapter “just sitting at a little table in my room… I had had a particularly deep experience of silence that morning, just basking in that.” .
• The final message is that all teachings – religious or otherwise – ultimately point to this silent presence. By opening to the silence behind thoughts, one realizes the “one eternal now” of pure Being.

Recurring themes: Each chapter reinforces that our true Self is ever-present, blissful awareness. Whether framed in Christian or Eastern terms, Bennett returns to the constant themes: the futility of seeking outside, the necessity of shifting attention inward, and the possibility of living fully as the love–joy of our own being. His personal journey – from monk to non-dual teacher – illustrates each point: we see him moving from external rites to inner silence, from spiritual seeking to effortless being. Through his teachings and examples, Bennett guides readers step-by-step toward the realization encapsulated in the book’s title: “I Am That I Am.”

Sources: Bennett’s insights and experiences are drawn from I Am That I Am (2013), as cited above . Each chapter summary is based on Bennett’s own words and stories to convey the structure and progression of the book’s message. 

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